Thursday, August 23, 2012

Three and a Half Virgins-John Blumenthal

Three and a Half Virgins

John Blumenthal

Farmer Street Press, Dec 22 2011, $8.99

ISBN: 9780967944418

As her husband turns forty with the middle age bulge beginning to show, Deirdre wishes her spouse Jimmy Hendricks (“No relation”) a happy birthday by informing him she is divorcing him. Stunned as if he is trapped in a Purple Haze and feeling almost as alone as he felt when he and Deirdre were allegedly happy over the last few years, Jimmy recognizes that he is a recovering idiot. He muses about what could have been if he was not an idiot when he attended high school and college and dreams of a reunion with any or all of his ex-girlfriends.

He decides to visit them to ask them to forgive his stupid troglodyte behavior though he also hopes for a heated tryst or three too. His best friend Morris the Orthodox Jew accompanies Jimmy on his redemption tour. Jimmy starts with the minister’s daughter Laura Beasley of Rimbaldi High School. Next up is Samantha Jane Conrad at Fryman College. Third at bat is Molly Martinez also at Fryman College. Then there was Christine while Molly was away at a family funeral.

With a nod to Denis Leary’s Bad Boy movie, Three and a Half Virgins is an amusing character study of a man looking back at his transgressions towards women. Each female owns a chapter so that the audience knows how they felt about Jimmy during and after. Although the storyline is thin, readers will enjoy Jimmy Hendricks’ forty years old idiot gig.

Harriet Klausner

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